Still you love me..

To my husband,

I am not the woman with a statuesque body

Still you love me.

I am not the wife you keeps a home spic n span

Still you love me.

I am not the wife who is very good in managing home finances

Still you love me.

I am not the wife who wakes up and serves hot breakfast

Still you love me.

I am not the wife who cuts perfect vegetables

Still you love me.

I am not the wife you has lots of patience

Still you love me.

To my children,

I am not the mom who believes in “gentle” parenting

Still you love me.

I am not the mom who always serves meals on time

Still you love me.

I am not the mom who is very organized

Still you love me.

I am the mom who is hormonally crazy

Still you love me.

But you know I am the wife and mom

Who loves you moon and back

Who can be fun and crazy

Who can be protective and fiery

Who will always be there with you in all the realms

Who will inspire you by aspiring for her dreams

Who will teach you kids to be independent and confident

Who can be her husband’s best friend

Because I am not the wife and mother who loves to sacrifice

I am not the wife and mother who tries to be too nice

I am the “real” woman who isn’t ashamed to bare her soul to you

I am the woman who talks about her goal to you

I am what I am and that’s why

Still you love me.

 

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Women..so easy to be shamed.

In lieu of the recent Padmavati controversy, groups have been threatening to chop off Deepika Padukone’s nose.  They have been calling her a “cheap” woman who dances for money and what not.  Vidya Balan despite being an actress par excellence has been questioned about her weight, made fun of, has been given unmentionable adjectives in social media by some unscrupulous men.  Kangna Ranaut was also not spared when she spoke her mind.  Ace sportsperson like Sania Mirza, Mithali Raj who have done India proud have been trolled and shamed because of what they wore!

These are only examples of few female celebrities who despite their achievements have been shamed.  Why is it that women, be it celebrities or a common one, are easily targeted and slut shamed or body shamed?  Do we see men being shamed so much?  When there is a bold scene in a movie, I have always seen the actress being shamed and not the actor.  Why?

This is because the thought process of our society is such.  Times are changing, women are reaching greater heights, speaking their mind and the more they are achieving and speaking up the more they are shamed!  A set of people in the society still believe that women should “behave” in the conventionally docile and submissive manner.  They should be in their “limits.”

Society in general wants a girl to behave and dress up in a certain fashion. If any untoward incident happens, fingers are always pointed towards the girl.  Well..”boys will be boys” logic should be thrown out of the window now! High time..

The fact that these celebrities give it back angers such sect of people even more.  How dare a woman retaliate or not get affected?  Haven’t we seen women being given rape threats?  Why is that acid attack, domestic violence, sexual violence victims are 95% times women?

Stop shaming the women!  If you have guts come and have a conversation with them like a civilized society.

Look before you speak

#Justathought
#Judgmentalworld
#socialmedianegatives

Lately a lot of incidents being posted in the media makes me think so..

People generally judge only by listening to or nowadays watching one side of the story and pass their verdict as someone being a “criminal” or a “horrific person.” Thanks to social media a person’s reputation is maligned even before the facts are verified or thoroughly investigated and the person is rightfully proved guilty. A finger is pointed at someone and everyone is ready to jump to conclusions.

Wish people had the patience to listen to both sides of the story before hastily jumping to a conclusion because if someone is falsely accused his/her reputation will take years to get restored back, it might be never be the same again!

Think before maligning someone when not proved so for sure..

Share cab-A slice of life

In the hustle bustle of this Mumbai city, we meet so many different people, each a character!  Like local trains, buses, one of the other places where we get to see different kinds of people is share cabs.

I often travel by share cabs and silently observe the co-passengers.  Some are simply glued to their phones, while some try to make a small polite conversation to cut out the boredom of the “traffic-laden” route.  Most of the times we don’t even know how the person looks like if he/she is in the front seat.

I would particularly like to share two incidents which caught my attention.  Once I was in the front seat and a male co-passenger was already there in the backseat engrossed in a serious conversation.  He was conversing in Marathi and being a Mumbaikar I understand Marathi very well.  He was in conversation with his wife and it seemed she was unhappy with his job and traveling.  He kept on calmly explaining her that he cannot leave the job and that she knew beforehand what his job was like.  Later on his relatives also bombarded him with calls and he again and again went on explaining the same thing!

Yesterday while traveling a young girl in her 20s kept on chatting nonchalantly and loudly with her friend not bothering about the co-passengers.  She kept on discussing how her boyfriend has cheated her and treated her like “shit” and so on!  She was least bothered who heard her and what she said!  Actually I liked the attitude.  I still think a thousand times before speaking!

This is Mumbai where people don’t bother what others will think or they know that in a share cab he/she will never meet the co-passenger again and hence won’t be judged! Its just another mode of conveyance for them.

As a writer, every new character that I meet evokes a thought in me.  It gives an understanding and perspective of how different people have different issues in their life and different ways of handling it!

As the quote says:  Traveling; it leaves you speechless, then turns you into a storyteller.

Traveling with kids..make it easy!

Often people believe life comes to a standstill after the arrival of a baby. They can’t go out, can’t travel, can’t have fun anymore! That’s not true! Of course, after the arrival of a child all programs or outings need to be accommodated and planned according to the child.

Me and my husband love traveling. Since my husband loves driving, we have taken many car trips too. These trips have included our kids as young as 7 months old!

When to take out a baby for travel is totally each parent’s choice. There are no hard and fast rules for parenting as every parent is different.

What I am sharing is my experience of traveling with kids at various stages and how to make the traveling fun and easy. These are just general tips and parents can modify according to their parenting styles and preferences:

  1. Don’t panic before your travel starts. Just go with the flow.
  2. Be flexible with the child’s food and food timings. One of the most common fears when traveling is not able to give the child his food on time or the regular food that he eats. Just relax. Your child will be absolutely okay if for a few days the timings go a bit haywire or if he has his milk twice instead of thrice. I believe that kids are pretty flexible that way.
  3. Carry extra clothes, diaper, bottle, nappy rash cream, wipes, few over-the-counter medicines for stomach issues handy in a bag when traveling with a baby. Just change the diaper every few hours. You can feed him at your will.
  4. Carry water, snacks, chocolates, etc. when traveling with slightly older kids. Don’t bother about the “junk” during holidays. After all holidays are meant to be break from the usual routine.
  5. When traveling in a car make halts at frequent intervals so that the kids can run around for some time, eat some meals, and enjoy the trip!
  6. Once my kids turned a year old, I never carried any food with me when traveling. They had the regular rice, dal, veggies, eggs, chicken, etc. that was available in the hotel. Of course, they wouldn’t eat too spicy things. They would even at the dhabas!
  7. Always book hotels which have kid-friendly activities. Kids have the best fun in the swimming pools. Most hotels have activities for the kids too depending on their age. Explore the surroundings too.
  8. Set yourself and your kids free once you travel! Let your kids also explore the new place. Don’t worry about when they wake up or when they sleep! We all follow a set routine throughout the year; vacations are meant to be “life without rules.”
  9. Always carry medicines for nausea and vomiting, headache, fever, antiseptic for injuries, chewing gums, Band-Aids. Keep a pair of clothes, a jacket handy for the children.
  10. Carry few board games when going for a long journey. Also for that time give some leeway to the gadget time.
  11. Tell them about the significance of the place that you are traveling. Also, talk to them and know about their perspective about the travel and the place.

Traveling is a lot of fun with kids, of course not without some crankiness or vomiting at times! But these are the memories that the kids do cherish for a lifetime.

Daily makeup routine using five products..

I am no makeup artist or expert but over the years with trial and error and watching tips and tricks from experts have learnt the art of basic makeup for daily wear which can be tweaked to a more glamorous look only by highlighting either the eyes or lips.  I must say here that this is only my trick as a layman and not a makeup expert.

Here I am talking about the daily makeup routine using only 5 products:  Concealer, CC cream or foundation, compact, kajal and lipstick.  These are the products which are worth investing and I believe every woman should have for the basic look.  This makeup can be done within 10 minutes or less once you are used to doing it.

Before starting the makeup, make sure your skin is clean.  Use a good face wash based on your skin type to wash your face, tone it using a good toner, and moisturize the skin using a good moisturizer.  The moisturizer gives a smooth finish and doesn’t make the look face cakey.  After following the CTM routine do the following steps:

1.  Apply concealer as dots all over your face.  Choose a concealer closer to your skin tone.  Apply all over the face using a sponge, brush or even fingers.  I generally use my fingers to apply the makeup products but you may use whatever you are comfortable using.  Make sure the concealer covers the face and neck properly.  Allow it to set.

2.  Apply foundation/CC cream again in the similar fashion as the concealer.  I find CC creams good for giving nice coverage to my face and it lasts longer too.  Using brush/fingers apply evenly on the face and neck.  Make sure it blends properly.

3.  Dab the compact after this.  The compact helps the makeup to set and gives an even and smooth finish.  Again, select a compact closer to your skin tone to give a natural look.

4.  Next comes the kajal, my favorite makeup product.  You might opt not to use it if you don’t like wearing kajal but I believe kajal gives an instant “lift” to the face and makes the face brighter.  Apply on the upper and lower waterline and upper and lower eyelids using a steady hand.  If you are not used to applying liner or kajal, practice!  I generally like using black kajal but you can use brown or any other color which you might like.

5.  Lastly comes the lipstick.  If you are going to office or want to go out during the daytime, you might opt for lighter shades like light pink, mauve, light brown.  Apply one coat of lipstick, dab some compact, and reapply.  This helps the lipstick to stay longer.  If you want to party or go out after office, apply a darker shade of lipstick like wine, red, dark brown, chocolate, etc.  Perk up your eye makeup with smoky look by smudging the kajal a bit.

Friends, this routine works for me, but you might experiment with your looks the way you want to.  Go for it!

A memorable road trip to Goa again

My husband loves driving but the Mumbai traffic doesn’t allow him to “relish” his driving.  He loves driving at 120 km/hr and that’s only possible on expressways or “good” highways.Goa car

Our much awaited holiday to Goa this year was planned on a short notice and we decided to drive down.  We had decided to start early morning to avoid the traffic and it was a rather good decision.  We started at 6 in the morning and within an hour we had crossed Navi Mumbai!

Road trips are not new for our family.  We have taken long road trips from Mumbai to Himachal before.  Few things when traveling with children that I keep in mind is to carry the required medicines, water, few chocolates, chewing gums, and of course a lot of good music in the car!

Halting at roadside dhabas is always a good experience barring the unhygienic washrooms.  That I would totally blame the lack of civic sense on people’s part.

Mumbai-Goa is a beautiful drive natural beauty wise.  We come across the Ghats, the greenery, and a lot of natural beauty.  Do keep Avomine handy if you have motion sickness.  It took us 12 hours to reach Goa with 2-3 halts in between.

We had made our reservation in Grand Hyatt Goa which is a beautiful and cozy property.  Unlike the other 5-star properties in which we have stayed in our Goa trips, this was a relatively smaller property but extremely beautiful one.  One more difference was that this was located on a bay and not beach.Grand Hyatt-1

The staff was extremely courteous and made us feel at home.  The kids indulged in some great kids activities.  We all thoroughly enjoyed the sailing experience by the Aquasail team.  It was my first experience of sailing and I must say I was not at all nervous in the ocean!Grand Hyatt 2

The resort had good restaurants too and we tried out some great new dishes too.  All-in-all we had an awesome three days of short break with a wonderful long drive and of course “stress-free” family time for all!